Recently , two paths has been created on this part of my life. I've been forcing myself real hard to go to the right one so that I wouldn't be such a hypocrite. But recently...
I stupidly took my nerves to find her. Keep finding her... And keep finding her... Till one day , she really frustrates on me. This rainbow doesn't want to see me again. She no longer wants to treat me the way before. It's over to her. So now two paths has opened. One , a path that I just go on hopefully she can find her way back there. Or two.... Forget her. Just as how I forgotten all of them... The society I loved.. The people I used to care for and no longer care for them... People who seemed to be out of my reach. The most cruel way yet an instant feeling getaway. However , these feelings will be so far away... Loving people would never be the same....
I am tempted to follow this... This awful path would just make history happen again. Although it is very fast acting.. Rather effective since I have one of the requirements.. But how? I would then be a hypocrite and just the same old self... Yup... The same old guy that suppose to change in a new way.. And just does the same mistakes all over again. I don't like this idea... Because then I would have to start all over again...? Then I would have to say.. Sigh.. I'm not like you.
As much as I say I love others... But when it comes to this... What can I do to mean it?
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